Saturday, July 25, 2009

Dilemma with Church

We had a mild setback with solid foods the other day. I heated up on green bean cube and one applesauce cube. For those of you who wonder what I mean by "cube"…when I make Constance's food I steam whatever it is I am making, puree it till the food is the right consistency, and then put it in ice cube trays. One ice cube puree is the equivalent to one serving. Anyway, back to my original thought. We had been doing so well for two or three days about her eating solids twice a day. Yesterday however I was able to get her to eat maybe on teaspoon of applesauce and no green beans.

When it comes to our baby and the nursery at church we keep Constance in the church service with us...for several reasons. One of the reasons is that we are not comfortable leaving her in the nursery. One person we more than likely do not know, watching several children of all ages. Those pre-toddlers can be viscous and have no sense of the words, "be careful, there is a baby right there." The second reason is that we are going to implement a book called, "Parenting in the Pew," by Robbie Castleman. The woman who wrote this book did not start this practice till her children where four years old. Here is the insert on the back since I could not find their website:

Sunday morning isn't a success if we have only managed to keep the kids quiet. And there's more to church for kids than trying out their new coloring books. Children are at church for the same reason Mom and Dad: for the privilege of worshipping God.

Burning with an infectious passion for worship, Robbie has learned how to teach children to praise God. She shows us how important it is to take our children's worship seriously. And then, with nitty-gritty advice and a touch of humor, she shows us how we can help our children (from toddler to teenager) participate in the most worthwhile and exciting act anybody can do.

"Worship is a challenge," Robbie admits. "With children it is a bigger challenge." But Jesus promised that the stones will cry out if we-and our children-forget to praise God.

While this is all well and good and we look forward to the time when Constance can comprehend what we are asking her to do; but that does not help us now. Our vocal baby, who is happiest right after she eats (which happens to be right before we go to church), likes to talk in church. In our SMALL congregation her happy babbles are heard in every corner of the four walls. So that she is not a distraction we take Constance out…which means that one of us misses the sermon. As bad as this sounds, I do not necessarily mind missing the sermon. I am tired of myself and my church being "dead." However missing it all together does not help the journey.


  1. I am a partner in this experience and today was no exception to the rule. Our little girl ended up not napping for over 5 hours, so our plan to go to the second service so that it coincides with her nap failed miserably. She was so close a couple of times but the VBS (Vacation Bible School) songs were just too full of energy for her. The noise kept stirring her curiosity.

    I am very encouraged and uplifted by your morning times this week. You are an amazing woman and I know that God is doing some great things in your life. Even if you do not see the fruit of your labor, it is helping. Do not give up. I want you to be the woman that God has designed and planned for you to be. Tell me how I can help and I will. I am sorry for not praying for you and the baby consistently.

    Time for bed.

    Love you,

    Daddy Moose

  2. Thank you for your update on the feeding habits of Miss Constance. However I do have an issue with how much you are feeding her. A "cube" of food! When MY children were that age they were eating 2 "bought" jars of vegies, 1 jar of dessert, pineapple delight was great by the way, and believed that if anyone else in the house was eating, it was fair game as well. This includes my daughter..... A cube is what-one spoonful...please the poor girl is going to starve. As we can all tell from your pictures she is simply wasting away.... FEED the girl.... That's okay when she comes to Nanny and Grandpa's we'll plump her up.... Cubes...really! Sorry to hear about your churh being dead. Is it really dead or is it just on life support in need of a quick shock to bring it back to life? That is alway tough. Trust me, Miss Constance's jabbering is probabbly bothering you and Keith much more that the congregation. At least she is alive and happy. Maybe just is just getting in the spirit the only way she knows how and wanting everyone else to join in..... Jabber and laugh girlfriend, jabber and laugh.....You go girl.... I better mosey. Thanks for all the updates, it makes me laugh. Love ya..DAD

  3. I can absolutely sympathize with you about not wanting to put Constance in the nursery -- we always kept our kids with us during the service. I agree with David you are probably more aware of the noise that she is making than anyone else -- besides if everyone else is truly worshipping and listening to the pastor they shouldn't even notice a baby babbling. Clearly there is a time to take a child out if it gets way too loud but just keep in mind that Constance will eventually learn that if she makes a noise you will take her out and give her one on one time and then service will get real interesting because she will test you. I have never read the book you referenced but we believe that the kids need to learn to be in worship and respect what is going on - that means that if we are standing to sing, read the bible, or greet people then they need to be taking part in that. If we are praying they need to be praying and so forth. I love that our church encourages the kids to go to the alter to pray and are teaching them now to respect that time - that is not something my home church encouraged when I was growing up. I love that my kids ask questions sometimes about the service which means they are listening more than I might think they are. It will all be fine - you guys are doing a great job!

  4. Just from my experience, a happy baby is never a distraction. A crying baby, however, can be. I don't blame you for not putting her in the nursery. But if you're worried about her noises bothering others, maybe sitting in the back will ease that tension a little. Then those in front of you are more likely to not be distracted...they'd have to look behind them to see the happy baby when they should be facing the preacher.

    On a side note, if you feel your church is really dead, maybe it's time to look for another. Or maybe a more subtle change...I changed services from the traditional 11:00 service to the 8:45 contemporary service. To me that in itself made a difference. Good luck, dollface.

    Love you,

  5. Hey girl,

    You keep on doing what the Lord tells you to do! You are following His lead and that's exactly what Constance needs!

    btw, it is really dangerous to have only one person watching all those kids in the nursery--
    churches tend to think "nothing will happen" until it does. You may want to check out this article I wrote several years ago (and pass it on to your pastor!)Here's the link:

    Take care!



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